Worth it......

A few days ago I was in Emily's room in the nicu and I was asked, "Is she worth it? even with all this (meaning the long week, time in the nicu, the long wait to have her, everything)." My response at the time was simply, "every second has been worth it." Well tonight they took out Emily's IV because it was not flushing right and she only needs it for the antibiotics now, so the nurse took it out temporarily. She is putting it back in before her next round of antibiotics, she just wanted to give Emily a little rest from it all. Jacob was there, but he was really tired and hasn't been sleeping well, so I sent him back to the hotel and I stayed there for a while longer.

As I sat there in the quite of her room, no other babies crying, no monitors beeping, a low buzz of the nurses talking, with my baby girl cuddled in my arms, my thoughts went back to that question. "Is she worth it?" I started to cry as I realized, she is more then worth it. We waited 9 years for this little one. All the heartache, all the tears, all the stress, all the worry. Every. last. bit. of it. has been worth it. I would wait another 9 years if it meant being Emily's mommy. I would wait a lifetime, if it meant being Emily's mommy. I would spend months in the nicu if it meant being her mommy. I would spend years there, if it meant being her mommy. Is she worth it? YES! With every inch of my being, YES!

There was a time when I never thought this day would come. And so many of my friends are out there right now, wondering if their day will come. My answer to you my friends is, I know what it's like. I know what it's like to jump every time the phone rings. To wonder, every time you check your email, if this will be the day, if that will be the email, if this phone call will be the one. I know what it's like to cry so many tears that you wonder if you will ever stop. I know what it's like to feel like giving up, wondering if any of this is worth it. My answer is, the tears of sorrow, will stop, and be replaced with tears of peace and joy. Someday, that phone call will be the one, or that email will be the one. That day will come. And when it does, everything, will be worth it!

My thoughts then turned to K... Our sweet angel. I look at Emily and I see her. I spoke to Emily of the immense love that K has for her. How much she will always love this little one that she gave life to. I spoke to her about how strong Emily herself is, and how she gets her strength from K who is perhaps one of the strongest people I know. We love you K! Thank you so much for giving us the gift of parenthood. We will make you proud.

Fasting and Prayers

Dear Family and Friends,
As you all know our little Emily was born early Monday morning and has been in the NICU since shortly after birth. She is improving, and if all continues to go well, we should be able to take Emily home next Tuesday (which how cool would that be! That is our 9th wedding anniversary). This Sunday is Fast Sunday. We would like to ask that you and your individual families remember Emily and her birth mom K in your fasting and prayers on Sunday. If you are unable to fast, will you please say a special prayer. Please bless that Emily will continue to improve and that we will be able to take her home soon. Also, K is going to court on Monday to relinquish her rights which will allow us to bring Emily home when the time comes, and allow us to proceed with the adoption. K is doing well and is very much at peace with her decision. Please bless her, that she will continue to feel strength, peace and comfort in her decision. That she will always know of the love that we all have for her. Thank you for your continued prayers and love.
With Love, Sharon, Jacob, Tammy, & Emily

Daddy's Girl/NICU Parents

An NICU Mommy..... That's what they call me. The nurses...... When we imagined this time, never did we imagine that we would be NICU Parents, but we are. Our little Emily was born with a low blood sugar which isn't unusual with babies of a high birth weight. After her first feeding her blood sugar actually went lower. So the dr. ordered an IV drip of Sugar water to try to get her blood sugar to go higher. It was working great! They were even turning down the IV drip and weaning her off of it. We could possibly go home soon they told us! Until she started eatting less and less. She went from eatting 2+ oz. in a sitting, to not even an oz. sometimes half an oz. And even getting her to eat that much took work. She was getting fussier and fussier. So the dr. ordered some tests. Turns out baby girl has an infection. Not surprising since K's water broke and it wasn't until almost 23 hours later that Emily was born. They turned the IV drip back up because she isn't eatting. This way she is at least staying hydrated. The dr. detected a heart murmur yesterday, it was still there today, so an Echocardiogram was ordered. The cardiologist at the hospital reviewed the tests. we are still waiting on the official report from Primary Children's Hospital in Salt Lake, but according to the cardiologist here, he says that the holes in the chambers in Emily's heart haven't closed up yet, but he says because she has been sick, that isn't surprising. So according to him, it isn't cause for concern right now, but if at her first well baby check up there is still a murmur, the pediatrician will need to keep an eye on it. We'll see if the PCMC dr. agrees with his assesment. Emily's oxygen levels have been dropping off and on, and her breathing goes a little fast at times, but that is probably due to the stress of being sick the dr. says. So they continue to monitor her. We continue to spend every second we can with her, and pray for her. We aren't sure how long we will be in the NICU. K signed a release with the hospital social worker allowing us to go home with the baby when she is released since K herself will be released before Emily. The nurse said to not be surprised if we are there through the weekend. We hope she is wrong. But, we will stay as long as it takes for Emily to get healthy.

Speaking of K, she is doing well. She was having some heart trouble as well, but an EKG showed nothing wrong according to the nurse. Haven't talked to the dr. yet though. But she is doing well. Walking around like a champ. So much so that I had to tell her to take it easy. I worry about her. But I know she is in good hands. K is a trooper. Very strong, very amazing. Emily comes from her, so I have no doubt she will be o.k. K should be released tomorrow (Wednesday) so court should be Thursday. We'll know more in the morning.

No, none of the last few days is like I imagined it would be. The experiences we have had, the tears we have shed, every last bit of it, has been worth it. Why? Because of this precious little one right here:

After her first bath. 1 hour old.

1 day old. Hanging out with Mommy and Daddy in the NICU. She loves her daddy! Always so content in his arms. You can see her IV in this pic along with some of the cord. The IV is in her head because she kept pulling out the ones in her arms, and this way it is out of the way.

Please, if you would, and if it isn't too much to ask, will you keep our little one in your prayers, and our K as well.

She's Here!!! Welcome to the World Emily Rose!!

Born July 26th at 5:26 a.m. weighing 9 lbs. 5 oz. 21 inches long.

Born via c-section after 22 hours of labor including 2 hours of pushing.

Our birth mom K is trully amazing!!

K is doing well. Really well. She even felt up to coming to the NICU to see Emily this evening. She has been walking here and there and is feeling better every second.

Emily is in the NICU because her blood sugars have been low. Although they seem to be under control now, she is doing well, but they are still monitoring her for a while longer. She will hopefully be released tomorrow from the NICU and be able to go to the regular nursery.

The last two days have been overwhelming in so many ways. I will write our birth story soon, when I can find the words to without bawling.

I'll post pics when we get home and I can edit the size so it doesn't lock up blogger. She is trully beautiful!

39 weeks!

Our expectant birth mom K is 39 weeks! We had her appt. today and the baby's heart rate is still nice and strong at 138. K has been having regular contractions, they are an hour apart, but have been steady since yesterday morning. So she is in labor, just the very early stages. She is still 70% effaced (has been for 3 weeks now) but is dialated to a 1.5 (she had been a 1 for two weeks, so that is progress). She has consistently been measuring slightly bigger then she actually is, when they measure her belly. I assumed she would measure at 41, and was even willing to bet on it, but I would have lost that bet. K is 39 weeks, but is measuring at 44!! What the! Yeah, even the dr. was shocked at that one! Dr. O thinks the baby is possibly 9 lbs., if not more. They have an ultrasound scheduled for Monday morning (at 7a.m.) to measure how big baby girl actually is. The dr. wants to avoid a c-section, or induction at all costs, but we will see. I did ask him how long they would let her go before inducing. He said the hospital actually has a "strict policy" against inducing before 41 weeks unless they have to. So we'll see. He said if baby is too big, they may need to do a c-section, but he will try to avoid that, now we wait till Monday (unless K's labor speeds up which is what I'm hoping for! I so don't want them to have to do a c-section! Ecspecialy since she is supposed to start school again in 4 weeks!) We were expecting a July baby, we may have an August baby. I hope not though! K is so completely miserable at this point. She is so swollen and can barely move. Baby girl needs to be nice to her her birth mommy and come out!

Here is a pic of our angel that I took after her appt.

38 weeks!

Today our expectant birth mom is 38 weeks. We also had her 38 week appt. today as well.

The dr. says there really isn't much change since last week. 70% effaced, dialated to a 1. Baby's heartrate is 152 and she has dropped slightly, but not much. We had a little scare when the doctor checked the position of the baby. He couldn't tell where her head was so he did an ultrasound (when I was pregnant with Tammy we had to do a c-section because she turned back around so she was butt down. Dr. was afraid K might have to have a C-Section too). Luckily baby's head is down so all is well. Here is a pic of K at 38 weeks.

37 weeks, and a contest!!

Today was K's 37 week appt. I can't beleive we only have 21 days till her due date! Crazy! After all these years it seems a little surreal that this is all happening and truth be told I keep waiting to be woken up and told it's all been a dream. Oh, but if it is a dream, what a sweet dream it is, that I don't ever want to wake up from!

K is doing great! She is healthy, happy, and ready to not be pregnant anymore. LOL I can't even imagine. Being 37 weeks pregnant in Utah, in the heat! Wowza! K is 37 weeks and is measuring at 39. (We're thinking maybe a lot of water? Not sure why she is measuring so much bigger.)

Baby Emily continues to grow and do well. Her heart rate is at 156. She is head down and ready.

K is 70% effaced and dialated almost to a 1 but not quite at a 1 yet.

So, here is what I am thinking. A few people I know have done this, including my FB/bloggy/adoption friend Brittany, and I thought it would be fun.

I want to hold a contest to see who can guess the closest to the baby's birth date, weight, and height. If 2 people guess the same date, the winner will be whoever guessed the closest on the weight and vice versa. If two people guess the exact same, the winner will be the first person to guess it. I may do a runner up prize in that case though. Not sure what the prize will be yet, but we'll see. I'll make it good, I promise. :D Maybe something I make, maybe a gift card to my favorite restuarant, not sure yet.

Anyhow, here is what I have so far (from FB):
Matt B. July 24th
Shantell L. July 20th 7 lbs. 6 oz. 20 inches
Melinda C. July 22nd 7 lbs. 8 oz. 21 inches
Merissa C. July 23rd 7 lbs. 9 oz. 20 inches
Jennilee M. July 24th 7 lbs. 10 oz. 20 inches
Gina T. July 28th 6 lbs. 9 oz. 20 inches

Carly J. July 22nd 5 lbs. 8 oz. 21 inches

Jessa S. July 27th 8 lbs. 6 oz.

Shelley I. August 2nd 6lbs. 11 oz. 20 inches

Theresa S. July 29th 8lbs. 19 1/2 inches

Barbara D. July 25th 7lbs. 2 oz. 20 1/2 inches

Mandy E. August 5th 7 lbs. 9 oz. 20 inches

Joy G. July 16th 6 lbs. 10 oz. 19 1/2 inches

Stephanie W. July 23rd 7 lbs. 12 oz. 20 inches

Schyla C. July 14th 7lbs. 8 oz.

Alison G. July 27th 7 lbs. 8 oz. 23 inches

Lisa Z. July 23rd 6 lbs. 8 oz. 19 inches

Sabrina C. July 24th 8 lbs.

Jill B. July 20th 8 lbs. 7 oz. 20 1/2 inches

Celeste July 25th 7 lbs. 10 oz.

Any more guessers? Leave a comment here, or email me, or FB me. Tell me your guess on weight, height and the date that Emily will make her arrival. (I will update this post with guesses as I get them. :D)

36 week appt.

Wanna hear the latest in baby land? Jacob and I went to K's dr. appt. on Thursday. Jacob hadn't been to an appt. yet, so this was his first time hearing the baby's heartbeat in person. I have videotaped the heartbeat before, but there is just something about actually hearing it that blows you away! He sat there in stunned silence. I sat there trying not to cry as my hubby listened to that precious sound, knowing that very soon, she will actually be here.

Emily's heartrate is at 150 and she is doing great. It was K's 36 week appt. but she is measuring at 38. I'm thinking the baby was stretching maybe? Not sure. She hasn't completely dropped but she's getting there. K is 50% effaced but not dialating yet. We are onto weekly appts. now so we will see what next week holds. Can't wait!!! We now have 26 days left!!

We have had a couple of baby showers. Both were family showers. The friends shower will be after Emily comes because the friend who is throwing that shower is in the middle of a move so ya, after will be better for her. That way she can get settled in to her new home without the stress of planning a shower. I'm tickled thats he offered to do the shower. We have been friends since my sohpmore year of high school (almost 18 years now) so that makes it extra special.

I will do a seperate post about the showers later. For now, here is a belly shot of our birth mom K.

What we do to pass time......

So last week hubby was at the store pricing shingles for the roof. We didn't need to replace the roof yet. We were told we had about 2-3 years when we had the house inspected before buying it, before we needed to replace the roof. But in 2-3 years we will have a child prepping for college and a toddler getting ready for pre-school, and possibly another newborn. So we figured while we had the money and time, we would go ahead and do it. Well hubby found some great ones at the big orange box on sale. 30 years, architectural design, slate in color. Gorgeous!

He had them delivered (roof top of course, cause it was free, and having to lug these heavy shingles up ourselves would just have been silly), got a couple of his brothers and a member of our church to come help and 3 days later, they were done! Well, the first day, his brother Joe came for 4-5 hours, the second day it was just Jacob, and the third day is when Joe came again, John came and the member from our church came. Seriously, the help was soooo appreciated. And I love LOVE how it looks now. As Tammy commented, our house actually looks newer, just by reshingling the roof. :D Next project for the outside of the house, repainting. :D

Above: Before (taken May 5, 2010)

And now, for the big reveal (that is, if you aren't on my Facebook and haven't already seen it)

The after (taken June 25, 2010)

We also bought a new dishwasher. The old one was leaking so we decided to buy a new one. We spent a little more than I would have liked, but we opted to get the one we would want when we redo our kitchen next year. Figured it would save money rather than having to get a new one now for a couple hundred and then spend more later to get what we actually want. Plus, it was on sale so we're happy.

Today is July 1st. I never thought July would come. July is the month Baby Emily is due. It seems surreal honestly. We have waited so long for this, and now it is almost here. We have had a couple of baby showers for family. My mom did one for her side, Jacob's sister-in-law did one for Jacob's side of the family and there is still 1 more before the baby comes. Our birth mom K and my stepmom, are throwing us one next week. My friend Annette offered to throw us one after the baby comes. She is in the middle of a move right now so when we talked, we decided after Emily comes would be better. We will probably do an open house as well but we haven't decided that yet. Since we are also doing an open house when the adoption is finalized and we are able to bless her and go to the temple, we may wait on that.

Later today we have a dr. appt. that we are going to. Hubby is coming with so that he can hear Emily's heartbeat in person for the first time. This is also the appt. where they do the tests to make sure all is good for a regular delivery, and I think they will start checking K as well to see if she is starting to dialate. K is 36 weeks today which means we have 28 days left till her due date. 4 weeks (give or take depending on if the baby comes early or late of course). Or as my friend Brittany would say, 4 Saturday's (it always seems less when you count in Saturday's). YAY!!!